Post by Nadica (She/Her) on Sept 3, 2024 1:44:52 GMT
Asking Eric: I’m furious with my in-laws after we got COVID at a family party - Published August 31, 2024
Piss-poor, minimizing response from the advice columnist. This is why you mask if you're worried about catching covid: No one else is going to go out of the way to keep you safe these days.
Dear Eric: My husband and I were invited to his nephew’s son’s bar mitzvah. We are both in our 70′s.
I have breast cancer that is in remission. We have made it a point to avoid shaking hands and keep our distance from other people. The family knows our feelings about avoiding exposure to Covid and other viruses.
At the dinner, a longtime friend of my husband’s brother pulled a chair over next to my husband to talk with him. In the course of the conversation, the friend revealed that his wife did not attend because she was home with Covid.
After we returned home, my husband and I both tested positive for Covid. We were both extremely ill. The parents of the bar mitzvah boy and a few others also became ill.
My in-laws admit the guest was the probable spreader. I was furious that they knew their friend’s wife was ill and told him it was OK to attend. They claim he was complying with CDC guidelines. My sister-in-law is upset I yelled at her and is demanding an apology.
At this point, I never intend to socialize with either one or attend any of their future super-spreader events. My stepdaughter thinks we are being unfair.
– Furious Guest
Dear Guest: Your feelings are valid, but too much of your anger is directed at your in-laws. That’s not going to change any of the decisions that were made. Yes, your in-laws could have held a more Covid-conscious gathering or put precautions like testing or masking in place. But they didn’t and that wasn’t one of the stipulations of your attendance.
I want to be clear – I’m not saying this is your fault in any way. Simply: the risk could have been lessened, but what happened to you wasn’t intentional. Holding on to resentment is going to eat at you. Let it go.
However, I partially disagree with your stepdaughter. You established a boundary. That’s fair. If public events with too many unknowns don’t feel right, you don’t have to go.
Piss-poor, minimizing response from the advice columnist. This is why you mask if you're worried about catching covid: No one else is going to go out of the way to keep you safe these days.
Dear Eric: My husband and I were invited to his nephew’s son’s bar mitzvah. We are both in our 70′s.
I have breast cancer that is in remission. We have made it a point to avoid shaking hands and keep our distance from other people. The family knows our feelings about avoiding exposure to Covid and other viruses.
At the dinner, a longtime friend of my husband’s brother pulled a chair over next to my husband to talk with him. In the course of the conversation, the friend revealed that his wife did not attend because she was home with Covid.
After we returned home, my husband and I both tested positive for Covid. We were both extremely ill. The parents of the bar mitzvah boy and a few others also became ill.
My in-laws admit the guest was the probable spreader. I was furious that they knew their friend’s wife was ill and told him it was OK to attend. They claim he was complying with CDC guidelines. My sister-in-law is upset I yelled at her and is demanding an apology.
At this point, I never intend to socialize with either one or attend any of their future super-spreader events. My stepdaughter thinks we are being unfair.
– Furious Guest
Dear Guest: Your feelings are valid, but too much of your anger is directed at your in-laws. That’s not going to change any of the decisions that were made. Yes, your in-laws could have held a more Covid-conscious gathering or put precautions like testing or masking in place. But they didn’t and that wasn’t one of the stipulations of your attendance.
I want to be clear – I’m not saying this is your fault in any way. Simply: the risk could have been lessened, but what happened to you wasn’t intentional. Holding on to resentment is going to eat at you. Let it go.
However, I partially disagree with your stepdaughter. You established a boundary. That’s fair. If public events with too many unknowns don’t feel right, you don’t have to go.